written and directed by
Against Black, TITLE CARD:
“…and these children that you spit on,
as they try to change their worlds are
immune to your consultations. They’re
quite aware of what they’re going through…
– David Bowie”
The Blank Screen and Title Card SHATTER to reveal…
1. EXT. SHERMER HIGH SCHOOL – DAY
During Brian’s monologue, we see various views of
inside the school including Bender’s locker.
Saturday…March 24, 1984. Shermer
High School, Shermer, Illinois.
60062. Dear Mr. Vernon…we accept
the fact that we had to sacrifice a
whole Saturday in detention for
whatever it was that we did wrong,
what we did was wrong. But we think
you’re crazy to make us write this
essay telling you who we think we
are, what do you care? You see us
as you want to see us…in the
simplest terms and the most
convenient definitions. You see us
as a brain, an athelete, a basket
case, a princess and a criminal.
Correct? That’s the way we saw each
other at seven o’clock this morning.
We were brainwashed…
2. INT. CLAIRE’S CAR – DAY
We see CLAIRE and her FATHER sitting in their car in
Claire is the prom queen and is clearly a snob.
I can’t believe you can’t get me
out of this…I mean it’s so absurd
I have to be here on a Saturday!
It’s not like I’m a defective or
I’ll make it up to you…Honey,
ditching class to go shopping
doesn’t make you a defective. Have
a good day.
Claire rolls her eyes and gets out of the car and walks
up the school front steps
3. INT. BRIAN’S CAR – DAY
We are in BRIAN’s car. His MOTHER is there and so is
his little SISTER. He is sort of a nerd.
Is this the first time or the last
time we do this?
Well get in there and use the time
to your advantage…
Mom, we’re not supposed to study; we
just have to sit there and do
Well mister you figure out a way to
BRIAN’S LITTLE SISTER
Brian gets out of the car and walks towards the school.
4. INT. ANDREW’S CAR – DAY
We see ANDREW and his FATHER. Andrew is clearly a
he﨎 wearing a letterman﨎 jacket with lots of patches
Hey, I screwed around…guys screw
around, there’s nothing wrong with
that. Except you got caught, Sport.
Yeah, Mom already reemed me, alright?
You wanna miss a match? You wanna
blow your ride? Now no school’s
gonna give a scholarship to a
Andrew gets out of the car and walks into the school.
5. EXT. SHERMER PARKING LOT – DAY
We see JOHN BENDER walking towards us. He is wearing
sunglasses. A car is coming towards him but he doesn’t
The car slams on its breaks directly in front of him.
Bender gets out of the frame. Out of the car steps
ALLISON. She is dressed all in black. She steps
forward to look in the car’s front window and the car
6. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
There are six tables in two rows of three.
Claire is sitting at the front table. Brian comes in
and sits at the table behind her.
Andrew comes in and points at the chair next to Claire
at the front table. She shrugs and he sits there.
In walks Bender, he touches everything on the checkout
desk and takes a few things in the process.
He walks over to where Brian is sitting and points to
the table on the opposite side of the Library. Brian
reluctantly gets up and moves.
Bender sits at the table where Brian was and puts his
Allison walks in. She walks all the way around the
library and sits in the back corner table, just behind
Andrew and Claire look at each other and snicker.
Brian looks at her in confusion and then turns away.
Enter RICHARD VERNON, a teacher. He holds a stack
of papers in his left hand. He addresses the group
such disrespect it makes you wonder how he ever got the
Well…well. Here we are! I want
to congradulate you for being on
Claire raises her hand.
Excuse me, sir? I think there’s
been a mistake. I know it’s
detention, but…um…I don’t think
I belong in here…
Vernon doesn’t care. He just continues to talk.
It is now seven-oh-six. You have
exactly eight hours and fifty-four
minutes to think about why you’re
here. To ponder the error of your
Bender spits into the air and catches the spit in his
Claire looks like she is going to gag.
…and you may not talk. You will
not move from these seats.
He glances up at Bender and points at him.
Vernon pulls the chair out from under Bender’s feet.
…will not sleep. Alright people,
we’re gonna try something a little
different today. We are going to
write an essay–of no less than a
thousand words–describing to me
who you think you are.
Is this a test?
Vernon passes out paper and pencils and takes no notice
And when I say essay…I mean essay.
I do not mean a single word repeated
a thousand times. Is that clear Mr.
Bender looks up.
Good. Maybe you’ll learn a little
something about yourself. Maybe
you’ll even–decide whether or not
you care to return.
Brian raises his hand and then stands.
You know, I can answer that right
now sir…That’d be “No”, no for me.
Sit down Johnson…
Thank you sir…
…is right across that hall. Any
monkey business is ill-advised…
He looks around at them.
Yeah…I got a question.
Vernon looks at him suspiciously.
Does Barry Manilow know you raid his
I’ll give you the answer to that
question, Mr. Bender, next Saturday.
Don’t mess with the bull young man,
you’ll get the horns.
That man…is a brownie hound…
Everyone tries to get comfortable and we hear a loud
snapping sound. Brian turns and looks and it is
Allison, biting her nails.
Bender’s eyes widen as he turns to look. Everyone is
looking now. Allison notices them looking at her.
You keep eating your hand and you’re
not gonna be hungry for lunch…
Allison spits part of her nail at Bender.
I’ve seen you before, you know…
We see Vernon look out from his office.
We see Brian playing with his pen.
(quietly to himself)
Who do I think I am? Who are you?
Who are you?
He attaches the pen to his bottom lip and puts the top
under his upper lip.
I am a walrus…
Bender looks at him in utter confusion. Brian notices
this, laughs and takes the pen out of his mouth–
Bender and Brian begin to take their jackets off at the
same time. They both notice this. Brian stops
Bender takes his all the way off. Brian rubs his hands
together and pretends to be cold. He pulls his jacket
back on. He turns and looks at Bender who is still
staring at him.
It’s the shits, huh?
Bender glares at him and Brian utters an uncomfortable
Bender turns away and crumples up his essay paper. He
throws it at Claire. It misses and goes over Claire’s
Andrew and Claire acknowlege it but continue to ignore
Bender starts loudly “singing” the musical part of a
song. �ah, nah, nah, nah, nah, nah…nah, nah,
I can’t believe this is really
happening to me…
Bender stops “singing” abruptly.
Oh, shit! What’re we s’posed to do
if we hafta take a piss?
If you gotta go…
We hear Bender unzip his fly.
You gotta go!
Everyone is now looking at Bender.
Oh my God!
Hey, yer not urinating in here man!
Don’t talk! Don’t talk! It makes
it crawl back up!
You whip it out and you’re dead
before the first drop hits the
Bender gasps mockingly.
You’re pretty sexy when you get
He turns to Brian.
Brian points at himself with his pen.
…why don’t you go close that door.
We’ll get the prom queen–
Claire turns and glares at him.
Bender ignores him.
If I lose my temper, you’re totalled
Why don’t you just shut up! Nobody
here is interested!
(to Claire about Bender)
Well hey Sporto! What’d you do to
get in here? Forget to wash your
Uh, excuse me, fellas? I think we
should just write our papers…
Look, just because you live in here
doesn’t give you the right to be a
pain in the ass…so knock it off!
Bender mockingly registers pain in his face.
It’s a free country…
He’s just doing it to get a rise out
of you! Just ignore him…
Sweets…you couldn’t ignore me if
Claire rolls her eyes.
(to Andrew and Claire)
Are you guys like boyfriend/girl-
Come on Sporto, level with me. Do
you slip her the hot…beef…
Claire and Andrew turn to face Bender, both furious.
Go to hell!
7. INT. VERNON’S OFFICE – DAY
We see Vernon in his office.
Hey! What’s going on in there?
Smug little pricks!
8. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
They all look at each other. Andrew turns away from
Bender stands up and walks over to the railing. He
What do you say we close that door.
We can’t have any kind of party
with Vernon checking us out every
Well, you know the door’s s’posed to
So why don’t you just shut up!
There’s four other people in here
God, you can count. See! I knew
you had to be smart to be a…a
Who the hell are you to judge
You know, Bender…you don’t even
count. I mean if you disappeared
forever it wouldn’t make any
difference. You may as well not
even exist at this school.
Bender probably is upset at this and he pauses a moment
before speaking. He doesn’t let his emotions out,
Well…I’ll just run right out and
join the wrestling team.
Andrew and Claire look at each other and laugh at
Maybe the prep club too! Student
No, they wouldn’t take you.
You know why guys like you knock
Oh, this should be stunning…
It’s ‘cause you’re afraid.
(with mock enthusiasm)
Oh, God! You ritchies are so smart,
that’s exactly why I’m not heavy in
You’re a big coward!
Brian feels left out.
(to no one imparticular)
I’m in the math club…
See you’re afraid that they won’t
take you. You don’t belong so you
just have to dump all over it…
Well…it wouldn’t have anything to
do with you activities people being
assholes…now would it?
Well you wouldn’t know…You don’t
even know any of us.
Well, I don’t know any lepers
either, but I’m not gonna run out
and join one of their fucking clubs.
Hey let’s watch the mouth, huh?
Brian again feels he needs to contribute.
I’m in the physics club too…
S’cuse me a sec…
What are you babbling about?
Well, what I said was…I’m in the
math club, the Latin club and the
physics club…physics club.
Bender nods and turns to Claire.
Hey…Cherry…do you belong to the
That’s an academic club…
So…academic clubs aren’t the same
as other kinds of clubs.
Oh, but to dorks like him…
Bender points at Brian.
What do you guys do in your club?
In physics, um, we ah, we talk about
physics…about properties of physics.
So it’s sorta social…demented and
sad, but social. Right?
Yeah, well, I guess you could
consider it a social situation. I
mean there are other children in my
club and uh, at the end of the year
we have, um, you know, a big
banquet, at the, uh, at the Hilton.
You load up, you party…
Well, no, we get dressed up…I
mean, but, we don’t…we don’t get
Only burners like you get high…
And, uh, I didn’t have any shoes.
So I had to borrow my dad’s. It
was kinda weird ‘cause my mom doesn’t
like me to wear other people’s
shoes. And, uh, my cousin Kent…my
cousin Kendall from, uh, Indiana…
He got high once and you know, he
started eating like really weird
foods. And uh, and then he just
felt like he didn’t belong anywhere.
You know, kinda like, you know
“Twilight Zone” kinda.
Sounds like you…
Look, you guys keep up your talking
and Vernon’s gonna come right in
here…I got a meet this Saturday
and I’m not gonna miss it on account
of you boneheads…
Oh and wouldn’t that be a bite…
Bender lets out a moan of fake agony.
Missing a whole wrestling meet!
Well you wouldn’t know anything
about it, faggot! You never competed
in your whole life!
(with mock hurt)
Oh, I know…I feel all empty inside
because of it. I have such a deep
admiration for guys that roll around
on the floor with other guys!
Ahhh…you’d never miss it. You
don’t have any goals.
Oh, but I do!
I wanna be just–like–you! I
figure all I need’s a labotamy and
Brian becomes interested.
You wear tights?
No I don’t wear tights, I wear the
They hear Vernon moving around out in the hall so
quickly comes and sits in the chair between Claire and
Andrew. He folds his hands on the table.
Vernon goes back into his office. Bender laughs and
gets up. He starts walking towards the double doors
that separate the library from the hallway.
You know there’s not s’posed to be
any monkey business!
Bender turns and points at Brian.
(in a stern voice)
Young man…have you finished your
Bender turns back away and goes to the door. He looks
around cautiously and removes a screw from the door.
What are you gonna do?
Drop dead, I hope!
9. INT. HALLWAY – DAY
We see Vernon getting a drink at the fountain. He
up and checks the way he looks in a mirror. He does a
muscular pose and utters some manly jibberish
10. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Brian looks up. Bender is messing with the door to the
Bender, that’s, that’s school
property there…you know, it doesn’t
belong to us. It’s something not to
be toyed with.
The door slams shut. Bender runs back to his seat.
That’s very funny, come on, fix it!
You should really fix that!
Am I a genius?
No, you’re an asshole!
What a funny guy!
Fix the door Bender!
Everyone just shhh!
11. INT. HALLWAY – DAY
We see Vernon walking back to his office. He stops and
listens to them through the closed door.
I’ve been here before, I know what
No! Fix the door, get up there and
12. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
We see Brian as we hear Vernon in the hall.
He opens the door and storms in.
Why is that door closed?
For a few seconds no one says anything, they just stare
Why is that door closed?
How’re we s’posed to know? We’re
not s’posed to move, right?
Vernon turns to Claire.
We were just sitting here, like we
were s’posed to…
Vernon looks around and looks at Bender.
Who closed that door?
I think a screw fell out of it…
It just closed, sir…
Vernon looks at Allison in the back.
Allison lets out a squeak and slams her face onto the
table, hiding in her jacket hood.
She doesn’t talk, sir…
Give me that screw…
I don’t have it…
You want me to yank you outta that
seat and shake it out of you?
I don’t have it…screws fall out
all of the time, the world’s an
Give it to me, Bender…
Excuse me, sir, why would anybody
want to steal a screw?
Watch it, young lady…
Vernon goes over to the door. He tries to hold it open
by putting a folding chair in front of it.
The door’s way too heavy, sir.
The door slams shut despite the chair.
Vernon opens the door again. He comes back in.
Andrew Clark…get up here. Come on,
front and center, let’s go.
Andrew gets up and walks over to Vernon.
Hey, how come Andrew gets to get up?
If he gets up, we’ll all get up,
it’ll be anarchy!
Vernon and Andrew are now attempting to move the steel
magazine rack in front of the door.
Okay, now, watch the magazines!
It’s out of my hands…
They get it into the doorway and it blocks the entire
That’s very clever sir, but what if
there’s a fire? I think violating
fire codes and endangering the
lives of children would be unwise
at this juncture in your career, sir.
Vernon thinks about it. He turns to Andrew.
Alright, what are you doing with
this? Get this outta here for God’s
sake! What’s the matter with you?
You know the school comes equipped
with fire exits at either end of the
Brian points at them and Bender glares at him.
Show Dick some respect!
Andrew and Vernon come back into the main section of
Let’s go…go! Get back into your
I expected a little more from a
You’re not fooling anybody, Bender!
The next screw that falls out is
gonna be you!
Vernon turns to leave.
(under his breath)
Eat my shorts…
Vernon spins in his tracks and faces Bender again.
What was that?
Eat my shorts!
You just bought yourself another
You just bought one more right
Well, I’m free the Saturday after
that…beyond that, I’m gonna have
to check my calendar!
Good! ‘Cause it’s gonna be filled,
we’ll keep goin’! You want another
one? Say the word, just say the
word! Instead of going to prison,
you’ll come here! Are you through.
I’m doing society a favor!
That’s another one, right now! I’ve
got you for the rest of your natural
born life if you don’t watch your
step! You want another one?
You got it! You got another one,
right there! That’s another one
Cut it out!
Claire mouths the word “Stop” to Bender.
Not even close, bud!
Good! You got one more, right
Do you really think I give a shit?
Bender glares at him.
How many is that?
That’s seven including the one when
we first came in and you asked Mr.
Vernon here whether Barry Manilow
knew that he raided his closet.
Now it’s eight…
You stay out of it!
Excuse me, sir, it’s seven!
Shut up, Peewee!
You’re mine Bender…for two months
I gotcha! I gotcha!
What can I say? I’m thrilled!
Oh, I’m sure that’s exactly what you
want these people to believe. You
know something, Bender? You ought
to spend a little more time trying
to do something with yourself and a
little less time trying to impress
people. You might be better off.
Alright, that’s it! I’m going to
be right outside those doors. The
next time I hafta come in here…I’m
cracking skulls! (Bender mouths �匇
Vernon leaves and closes the door. A musical riff
builds to a climax as Bender screams.
We see the clock, it reads a quarter to eight.
We see Bender, lighting his shoe on fire and lighting a
cigarette with his shoe.
We see Claire thinking.
We see Brian playing with his balls.
We see Andrew playing with his sweatshirt.
We see Allison pulling a string around her finger and
it turn purple.
We see Bender put the flames on his shoe out. He then
We see Allison drawing.
We see Andrew playing paper football. He cheers
Allison shakes dandruff from her hair onto her picture.
We see everyone fall asleep.
13. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Vernon is standing there staring at the sleeping kids.
Wake up! Who has to go to the
Everyone raises their hands.
14. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
We see the clock, it now says 10:22.
We see Andrew stretching. We see Bender tearing pages
out of a book. He is tossing them around.
That’s real intelligent.
You’re right…it’s wrong to
He continues to tear pages out.
It’s such fun to read…and, Molet
really pumps my nads!
(pronouncing it correctly)
I love his work.
Bender tosses the rest of the pages at Brian. He picks
up the card catalogue drawer and begins to take cards
Big deal…nothing to do when you’re
locked in a vacancy..
Speak for yourself…
Do you think I’d speak for you? I
don’t even know your language!
Andrew turns to Claire.
Hey, you grounded tonight?
I don’t know, my mom said I was but
by dad told me to just blow her off.
Big party at Stubbies, parents are
in Europe. Should be pretty wild…
Yeah, can you go?
I doubt it…
Well ‘cause if I do what my mother
tells me not to do, it’s because
because my father says it’s okay.
There’s like this whole big monster
deal, it’s endless and it’s a total
drag. It’s like any minute…
Who do you like better?
You like your old man better than
They’re both strict.
No, I mean, if you had to choose
I dunno, I’d probably go live with
my brother. I mean, I don’t think
either one of them gives a shit
about me…it’s like they use me
just to get back at each other.
Suddenly, from the back of the room. Allison speaks.
Everyone looks at her shocked. Allison blows her hair
out of her eyes and grins.
You’re just feeling sorry for
Yeah, well if I didn’t nobody else
Aw…you’re breaking my heart…
Bender jumps down and goes next to Andrew.
You get along with your parents?
Well if I say yes, I’m an idiot,
You’re an idiot anyway…But if you
say you get along with your parents
well you’re a liar too!
Bender turns and walks away from him. Andrew follows
and pushes Bender.
You know something, man…If we
weren’t in school right now, I’d
Bender points his middle finger at the floor.
Can you hear this? Want me to turn
Bender flips his hand around so he is now giving Andrew
Brian comes over and puts a hand on each of the guy’s
Hey fellas, I mean…
Andrew pushes away from Brian.
…I don’t like my parents either,
I don’t…I don’t get along with
them…their idea of parental
compassion is just, you know, wacko!
Bender turns to Brian.
You are a parent’s wet dream, okay?
Bender starts to walk away.
Well that’s a problem!
Look, I can see you getting all
bunged up for them making you wear
these kinda clothes. But face it,
you’re a Neo-Maxi-Zoom-Dweebie!
What would you be doing if you
weren’t out making yourself a better
Why do you have to insult everybody?
I’m being honest, asshole! I would
expect you…to know the difference!
Yeah well, he’s gotta name!
What’s your name?
Bender walks away.
What’s your name?
Claire…it’s a family name!
Nooo…It’s a fat girl’s name!
Well thank you…
I’m not fat!
Well not at present but I could see
you really pushing maximum density!
You see, I’m not sure if you know
this…but there are two kinds of
fat people. There’s fat people that
were born to be fat, and then there’s
fat people that were once thin but
they became fat…so when you look
at them you can sorta see that thin
person inside! You see, you’re
gonna get married, you’re gonna
squeeze out a few puppies and then,
He mimes becoming fat, making noises.
Claire gives him the finger.
Oh…obscene finger gestures from
such a pristine girl!
I’m not that pristine!
Bender bends down closer to Claire.
Are you a virgin?
I’ll bet you a million dollars that
you are! Let’s end the suspense!
Is it gonna be…
…a white weddin?
Why don’t you just shut up?
Have you ever kissed a boy on the
Have you ever been felt up? Over
the bra, under the blouse, shoes
off…hoping to God your parents
don’t walk in?
Claire is getting upset.
Do you want me to puke?
Over the panties, no bra, blouse
unbuttoned, Calvin’s in a ball on
the front seat past eleven on a
Leave her alone!
Bender slowly stands and faces Andrew.
I said leave her alone!
You gonna make me?
Bender walks over to where Andrew is standing.
You and how many of your friends?
Just me, just you and me. Two hits.
Me hitting you, you hitting the
floor! Anytime you’re ready, pal!
Bender goes to hit him but Andrew gets Bender down on
the ground with a wrestling move.
I don’t wanna get into to this with
Andrew gets up.
Bender gets up.
‘Cause I’d kill you…It’s real simple.
I’d kill you and your fucking parents
would sue me and it would be a big
mess and I don’t care enough about
you to bother.
Andrew turns and walks away. Bender takes out a
switchblade and opens it.
He stabs the switchblade into a chair.
Let’s end this right now. You don’t
talk to her…you don’t look at her
and you don’t even think about her!
You understand me?
I’m trying to help her!.
We see the janitor, CARL come into the room.
Brian, how you doing?
Your dad works here?
Brian is embarrassed.
Can I ask you a question?
How does one become a janitor?
You wanna be a janitor?
No I just wanna know how one becomes
a janitor because Andrew here, is
very interested in persuing a
career in the custodial arts…
Oh, really? You guys think I’m
just some untouchable peasant? Peon?
Huh? Maybe so, but following
a broom around after shitheads like
you for the past eight years I’ve
learned a couple of things…I look
through your letters, I look through
your lockers…I listen to your
conversations, you don’t know that
but I do…I am the eyes and ears of
this institution my friends. By the
way, that clock’s twenty minutes
Everyone groans. Bender smiles.
15. INT. VERNON’S OFFICE – DAY
The clock says 11:30. Vernon gets up and leaves.
16. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Bender starts to whistle a marching tune and everybody
Vernon enters. Bender begins to whistle Beethoven’s
Allright girls, that’s thirty
minutes for lunch…
Well I think the cafeteria would be
a more suitable place for us to eat
lunch in, sir!
Well, I don’t care what you think,
Uh, Dick? Excuse me, Rich…will
milk be made available to us?
We’re extremely thirsty sir…
I have a very low tolerance for
I’ve seen her dehydrate sir, it’s
Relax, I’ll get it!
Ah, ah, ah grab some wood there, bub!
What do you think, I was born
yesterday? You think I’m gonna
have you roaming these halls?
He points at Andrew.
He points at Allison.
And you! Hey! What’s her name?
Wake her! Wake her up!
Come on, on your feet missy! Let’s
go! This is no rest home!
Allison gets up.
There’s a soft drink machine in the
teacher’s lounge. Lets go!
16. INT. HALLWAY – DAY
Andrew and Allison are walking in the hall.
So, what’s your poison?
Allison doesn’t answer.
What do you drink?
Allison still doesn’t answer.
Okay…forget I asked…
Allison waits for two beats and then speaks.
Vodka? When do you drink vodka?
Is that why you’re here today?
Allison doesn’t answer.
Why are you here?
Allison snaps back.
Why are you here?
They stop walking and Andrew leans against the wall.
Um, I’m here today…because uh,
because my coach and my father don’t
want me to blow my ride. See I get
treated differently because uh,
Coach thinks I’m a winner. So does
my old man. I’m not a winner
because I wanna be one… I’m a
winner because I got strength and
speed. Kinda like a race horse.
That’s about how involved I am in
what’s happening to me.
Yeah? That’s very interesting.
Now why don’t you tell me why you’re
really in here.
17. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Claire and Bender and Brian are all sitting around
waiting for the Cokes.
Claire…you wanna see a picture of
a guy with elephantitus of the nuts?
It’s pretty tasty…
No thank you…
How do you think he rides a bike?
Claire rolls her eyes and turns away in disgust.
Oh, Claire…would you ever consider
dating a guy like this?
Can’t you just leave me alone?
I mean if he had a great personality
and was a good dancer and had a cool
car…Although you’d probably have
to ride in the back seat ‘cause his
nuts would ride shotgun.
You know what I wish I was doing?
Op, watch what you say, Brian here
is a cherry.
I wish I was on a plane to France.
I’m not a cherry.
When have you ever gotten laid?
I’ve laid, lotsa times!
She lives in Canada, met her at
Niagra Falls. You wouldn’t know
Ever laid anyone around here.
Brian shushes Bender and points at Claire whos back is
Oh, you and Claire, did it!
Claire spins around.
What are you talking about?
Let’s just drop it, we’ll talk about
No! Drop what, what’re you talking
Well, Brian’s trying to tell me that
in addition to the number of girls
in the Niagra Falls area, that
presently you and he are, riding
the hobby horse!
No I’m not! I’m not! John said I
was a cherry and I said I wasn’t,
that’s it, that’s all that was said!
Well then what were you motioning to
You know I don’t appreciate this
very much, Brian.
He is lying!
Oh you weren’t motioning to Claire?
You know he’s lying, right?
Were you or were you not motioning
Yeah, but it was only…was only
because I didn’t want her to know
that I was a virgin, okay?
Bender just stares at him.
Excuse me for being a virgin, I’m
Why didn’t you want me to know you
were a virgin?
Because it’s personal business, it’s
my personal, private business.
Well Brian, it doesn’t sound like
you’re doing any business…
I think it’s okay for a guy to be a
Bender looks suprised.
Claire smiles and nods.
18. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Everybody has lunches now.
Claire begins to take hers out of a small shopping bag.
What’s in there?
Guess, where’s your lunch?
You’re wearing it…
Bender grabs a Coke and tosses it over to Allison who
catches it without even looking up.
Bender then watches Claire set up a sushi platter.
Rice, uh, raw fish and seaweed.
You won’t accept a guys tongue in
your mouth and you’re gonna eat
Can I eat?
I don’t know…give it a try…
We now watch Andrew take a couple sandwiches out of his
bag, a bag of potato chips, an apple, a banana, a bag
cookies and a carton of milk.
Allison opens her Coke and it fizzes over. She loudly
slurps it up off the table and her fingers.
Andrew sees Bender looking at him.
What’s your problem?
Allison opens her sandwich and and tosses the meat up.
It lands on the sculpture above.
She opens some pixie stix and pours the sugar on the
sandwich and then puts Cap’n Crunch on top of that.
crushes the sandwich together and loudly eats it.
Bender goes over and sits by Brian, Bender takes
What’re we having?
Uh, it’s your standard, regular
lunch I guess…
Bender reaches in the bag and pulls out a thermos. He
sets it on the table and points at it.
Bender goes in again and pulls out a juice box.
Brian reaches toward the bag and Bender slaps his hand.
That’s apple juice…
I can read! PB & J with the crusts
cut off…Well Brian, this is a
very nutritous lunch, all the food
groups are represented. Did your
mom marry Mr. Rogers?
Uh, no, Mr. Johnson…
Andrew and Claire smile at each other. Bender stands.
Here’s my impression of life at big
(in a loud and friendly voice)
(in a kiddie voice)
How’s your day, pal?
Great Dad, how’s yours?
Super, say son, how’d you like to go
fishing this weekend?
Great Dad, but I’ve got homework to
That’s alright son, you can do it,
on the boat!
Dear, isn’t our son swell?
(quiet and motherly)
Yes Dear, isn’t life swell?
Bender mimes mother kissing father and then father
kissing mother and then father punching mother in the
Suddenly it’s not so funny anymore.
Alright, what about your family?
That’s real easy!
Bender stands again and points forward.
(as his father)
Stupid, worthless, no good, God
damned, freeloading, son of a bitch,
retarded, bigmouth, know it all,
(as his mother)
You forgot ugly, lazy and
Bender slams his hand back to slap his invisable
(as his father)
Shut up bitch! Go fix me a turkey
What about you Dad?
(as his father)
No, Dad, what about you?
(as his father)
No, Dad, what about you?
(as his father–yelling)
He reaches out and pretend he’s his father hitting him.
Is that for real?
You wanna come over sometime?
That’s bullshit. It’s all part of
your image, I don’t believe a word
Bender actually looks hurt.
You don’t believe me?
Did I stutter?
Bender comes over to Andrew and rolls up his right
sleeve to reveal a circular shaped burn.
Do you believe this? Huh? It’s
about the size of a cigar…Do I
stutter? You see, this is what you
get in my house when you spill paint
in the garage.
Bender begins to walk away.
See I don’t think that I need to
sit here with you fuckin’ dildos anymore!
Bender walks over to a map table and throws all the
on the floor. He climbs up on top of the table and
up to the second floor balcony.
You shouldn’t have said that!
How would I know, I mean he lies
about everything anyway!
19. INT. VERNON’S OFFICE – DAY
Vernon puts an orange in his mouth and then attempts to
pour coffee out of his thermos. The top comes off and
the coffee goes all over his desk.
20. INT. HALLWAY – DAY
Vernon walks into the hallway, talking to himself.
Coffee…looks like they scrape it
off the bottom of the Mississippi
river. Everything’s polluted,
everything’s polluted…the coffee.
Bender comes out of the library doors followed
Bender and Claire are walking next to each other.
and Andrew are walking next to each other and at the
of the line, Allison is following.
How do you know where Vernon went?
Well then, how do you know when he’ll
I don’t…being bad feels pretty
What’s the point in going to Bender’s
This is so stupid…Why do you think,
why are we risking getting caught?
So then what are we doing?
You ask me one more question and I’m
beating the shit out of you!
Bender opens his locker.
My maid’s on vacation.
Bender pulls out a bag of marijuana.
Screw that Bender…put it back!
Bender walks away.
Drugs…the boy had marijuana.
Claire walks after Bender.
That was marijuana!
Andrew follows the other two. Brian looks at Allison
who is standing there with her mouth open.
Do you approve of this?
Brian turns and leaves. Allison steals the lock off of
We see the crowd walking down the hall.
We’ll cross through the lab, and
then we’ll double back.
You better be right, if Vernon cuts
us off it’s your fault, asshole!
What’d he say? Where’re we going?
They see Vernon down one of the halls. We have various
sequences of them running around and seeing Vernon
Wait! Wait, hold it! Hold it! We
have to go through the cafeteria!
No, the activities hall.
Hey man, you don’t know what you’re
No you don’t know what you’re
Now we’re through listening to you,
we’re going this way.
They all go Andrew’s way and run into a hall closed by
an iron gate.
Great idea Jagoff!
Fuck you! Why didn’t you listen to
No, just me!
What do you mean?
Get back to the library, keep your
unit on this!
Bender puts his bag of marijuana into Brian’s
Bender runs away singing loudly. � wanna be an
We see Vernon hear Bender.
The rest of them run.
That son of a bitch!
We see Vernon looking for Bender until he finds him in
Bender is going up for a basket.
He dunks the ball. Vernon enters.
Bender! Bender! Bender! What is
this? What are you doing here, what
Out! That’s it Bender! Out, it’s
Don’t you wanna hear my excuse?
I’m thinking of trying out for a
Gimmie the ball, Bender.
Bender fakes the ball at Vernon. He then sets the ball
down and rolls it at Vernon who kicks it back at him.
21. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
The rest of the kids are all sitting back in their
when Bender and Vernon enter. Vernon pushes Bender.
Get your stuff, let’s go!
Mr. Wiseguy here has taken it upon
himself to go to the gymnasium. I’m
sorry to inform you, you’re going to
be without his services for the rest
of the day.
Everything’s a big joke, huh Bender?
The false alarm you pulled, Friday,
false alarms are really funny,
aren’t they…What if your home,
what if your family…
…what if your dope was on fire?
Impossible, sir…It’s in Johnson’s
You think he’s funny? You think
this is cute? You think he’s
bitchin’, is that it? Lemme tell
you something. Look at him, he’s a
You wanna see something funny? You
go visit John Bender in five years!
You’ll see how God damned funny he
What’s the matter, John? You gonna
cry? Let’s go…
Vernon grabs Bender’s shoulder.
Hey keep your fuckin’ hands off me!
I expect better manners from you,
Bender takes his sunglasses out of his pocket and lays
them in front of Andrew.
For better hallway vision!
Bender leaves but not before pushing stuff over on the
21. INT. CLOSET – DAY
Vernon has put Bender in a closet and is in there
talking to him.
That’s the last time, Bender. That’s
the last time you ever make me look
bad in front of those kids, do you
hear me? I make $31,000 dollars a
year and I have a home and I’m not
about to throw it away on some punk
like you…But someday, man, someday.
When you’re outta here and you’ve
forgotten all about this place…
And they’ve forgotten all about you
and you’re wrapped up in your own
pathetic life…I’m gonna be there.
That’s right. And I’m gonna kick
the living shit out of you, man, I’m
gonna knock your dick in the dirt!
Are you threatening me?
What’re you gonna do about it? You
think anybody’s gonna believe you?
You think anybody’s gonna take your
word over mine? I’m a man of
respect around here. They love me
around here, I’m a swell guy…you’re
a lying sack of shit! And everybody
knows it. Oh, you’re a real tough
guy…come on, come on…get on your
feet, pal! Let’s find out how
tough you are! I wanna know right
now, how tough you are! Come on!
I’ll give you the first punch, let’s
go! Come on, right here, just take
the first shot! Please, I’m begging
you, take a shot! Come on, just
take one shot, that’s all I need,
just one swing…
Bender just sits there staring at Vernon. Vernon fakes
a punch and Bender flinches.
That’s what I though…you’re a
Vernon leaves and locks the closet door after him.
Bender climbs into a hatch in the ceiling and
22. INT. HEATING DUCT – DAY
Bender is slowly crawling through a heating duct.
A naked blond walks into a bar, with
a poodle under one arm and a two
foot salami under the other. She
lays the poodle on the table. Bar-
tender says: “I suppose you won’t
be needing a drink.” The naked
The ceiling under Bender gives and he falls through.
23. INT. FACILTY BATHROOM – DAY
We see the door to the bathroom. We hear Vernon
Jesus Christ, allmighty!
24. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Bender walks down the stairs.
I forgot my pencil…
We hear Vernon in the hall.
God damnit! What in God’s name is
going on in here?
What was that ruckus?
Uh, what ruckus?
I was just in my office and I heard
Could you describe the ruckus, sir?
Watch your tongue young man, watch
We see Bender under the table by Claire’s legs. He
up and bangs his head on the table. He groans.
Above the table, Andrew and Claire try to take credit
for the noise by making more noise.
What is that? What, what is that,
what is that noise?
Under the table, Bender looks between Claire’s legs and
can see her panties. He puts his head between Claire’s
Really, sir, there wasn’t any noise…
Claire squeels. She squeezes Bender’s head between her
Everyone starts faking a coughing fit.
That noise? Was that the noise you
were talking about?
No, it wasn’t. That was not the
noise I was talking about. Now, I
may not have caught you in the act
this time, but you can bet I will.
Allison laughs at Vernon.
You make book on that missy!
And you! I will not be made a fool
He turns and walks away. We see that he still has the
toilet seat cover stuck to his pants.
Everyone laughs except Claire who lets Bender out to a
barage of slaps.
It was an accident!
You’re an asshole!
So sue me…
Bender gets up and walks over to Brian.
So, Ahab…Kybo Mein Doobage…
Brian gives Bender his bag of marajuana. Bender turns
and walks away.
Yo waistoid…you’re not gonna blaze
up in here!
Claire gets up and goes after him. Then Brian.
25. INT. STAIRS – DAY
We see Vernon go down the stairs.
26. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Brian, Bender and Claire are sitting in a circle and
Bender lights Claire up and she coughs the smoke out.
Brian laughs at her. He exhales and tries to eat the
smoke. He talks in a really weird voice.
Chicks, cannot hold der smoke! That’s
what it is!
Do you know how popular I am? I’m
so popular, everybody loves me so
much, at this school…
Brian waves Claire over to him and he falls over.
We see Andrew emerge from a really smokey room. He
inhales another puff and then starts dancing to
He goes back in the room he was in. He screams and it
shatters the glass in the door.
27. INT. BASEMENT – DAY
Vernon is glancing through the confidential files in
Mister, oh mister Tearney…a
history of slight mental illness?
Wooh, no wonder he’s so fucked up!
Hey Carl, how you doin’?
Good, what’s up?
Not much, what’s happening, what
are you doing in the basement files?
Oh, nothin’ nothin’ here. I’m just
doin’ a little homework here…
Carl, laughing, comes over and looks at the files that
Vernon was looking at.
Look, Carl…this is a highly
sensitive area and I, I tell you
something…certain people would be
very very embarrassed. I would really
appreciate it if if if if this would
be something that, that you and I
could keep between us…
What’re you gonna do for me, man?
Well, well what would you like?
Got fifty bucks?
28. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
We see Andrew and Brian laughing. Allison is hanging
out over by the statue in the back of the library.
No no man, no; you got a middle
Allison suddenly takes interest in the conversation and
as she speaks, she moves over and sits next to the two.
Your middle name is Ralph, as in
Brian and Andrew look at her in confusion.
…your birthday is March 12th,
you’re five-nine and a half you
weigh a hundred and thirty pounds
and your social security number is
Andrew is impressed.
Wow! Are you psychic?
Well would you mind telling me how
you know all this about me?
Allison reaches in her bag.
I stole your wallet…
She produces it in her hands and grins.
Give it to me…
Allison reluctantly hands over the wallet and Brian
glances through it to make sure nothing is missing.
This is great…you’re a thief too!
I’m not a thief!
What’s there to steal? Two bucks
and a beaver shot!
He’s got a nudie picture in there!
I saw it, it’s perverted!
Alright, let’s see it!
We see Bender, he is brushing his teeth with one of
Claire’s cosmetic brushes.
We see Claire looking through Bender’s wallet pictures.
Are all these your girlfriends?
Some of them…
What about the others?
Well, some I consider my girlfriends
and some…I just consider…
Whether or not, I wanna hang out
You don’t believe in just one guy,
Yeah…that’s the way it should be.
Well, not for me…
Bender clearly doesn’t want to answer that. He acts
How come you got so much shit in
How come you got so many
I asked you first…
I dunno…I guess I never throw
Neither do I…
We cut back to where Andrew, Brian and Allison are
sitting, Andrew is looking through Brian’s wallet.
This is the worst fake ID I’ve ever
Do you realize you made yourself
Oh, I know…I know, I goofed it…
What do you need a fake ID for?
(like it’s obvious)
So I can vote!
Allison looks up suddenly.
You wanna see what’s in my bag?
BRIAN & ANDREW
Allison looks hurt and then resentful. Just to spite
them, she dumps the contents of her bag onto the couch.
Lots of stuff comes out.
Holy shit! What is all that stuff?
Do you always carry this much shit
in your bag?
Yeah…I always carry this much shit
…in my bag…You never know when
you may have to jam…
Are you gonna be like a shopping
bag lady? You know like, sit in
alleyways and like talk to buildings
and wear men’s shoes and that kinda
I’ll do what I have to do…
Why do you have to do anything?
My home life is un…satisfying…
So you’re saying you’d subject
yourself to the violent dangers of
the Chicago streets because your
homelife is unsatisfying?
I don’t have to run away and live
in the street…I can run away and,
go to the ocean, I can go to the
country, I can go to the mountains.
I can go to Israel, Africa,
Brian looks at her and then moves over to Andrew.
Andy…you wanna get in on this?
Allison here says, she wants to run
away, because her home life is
Well everyone’s home lives are un-
satisfying…If it wasn’t, people
would live with there parents
Yeah, yeah I understand. But I
think that her’s goes beyond, you
know, what guys like you and me…
consider normal unsatisfying…
Nevermind…forget it, everything’s
Allison starts putting everything back in her purse.
What’s the deal?
No! There’s no deal, Sporto.
Forget it, leave me alone.
Wait a minute, now you’re carrying
all that crap around in your purse.
Either you really wanna run away or
you want people to think you wanna
Allison gets up and walks away.
The girl is an island, with herself.
Andrew gets up and goes after her.
Hi, you wanna talk?
Where do you want me to go?
Andrew turns away and Allison starts to cry.
You have problems…
Oh, I have problems?
You do everything everybody ever
tells you to do, that is a problem!
Okay, fine…but I didn’t dump my
purse out on the couch and invite
people into my problems…Did I?
So what’s wrong? What is it? Is
is bad? Real bad? Parents?
Allison is silently crying.
What do they do to you?
They ignore me…
They both are crying silently.
29. INT. BASEMENT – DAY
Vernon and Carl are sitting talking.
What did you want to be when you
When I was a kid, I wanted to be
Carl don’t be a goof! I’m trying
to make a serious point here…I’ve
been teaching, for twenty two years,
and each year…these kids get more
and more arrogant.
Aw bull shit, man. Come on Vern,
the kids haven’t changed, you have!
You took a teaching position, ‘cause
you thought it’d be fun, right?
Thought you could have summer
vacations off…and then you found
out it was actually work…and that
really bummed you out.
These kids turned on me…they think
I’m a big fuckin’ joke…
Come on…listen Vern, if you were
sixteen, what would you think of
Hey…Carl, you think I give one
rat’s ass what these kids think of
Yes I do…
You think about this…when you get
old, these kids; when I get old,
they’re gonna be runnin’ the country.
Now this is the thought that wakes
me up in the middle of the night…
That when I get older, these kids
are gonna take care of me…
I wouldn’t count on it!
Vernon ponders that statement for a moment.
30. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
They are sitting on the floor in a circle.
What would I do for a million bucks?
Well, I guess I’d do as little as I
Well, how’m I s’posed to answer?
The idea is to like search your mind
for the absolute limit. Like, uh,
would you drive to school naked?
Um, uh…would I have to get out of
In the spring, or winter?
It doesn’t matter…spring…
In front of the school or in back
of the school?
I’d do that!
They all look at her.
I’ll do anything sexual, I don’t
need a million dollars to do it
I already have…I’ve done just
about everything there is except a
few things that are illegal…I’m a
Claire rolls her eyes.
Are your parents aware of this?
The only person I told was my
And what’d he do when you told him?
He nailed me…
I don’t think that from a legal
standpoint what he did can be
construed as rape since I paid him.
He’s an adult!
Allison is relishing this attention.
Yeah…he’s married too!
Claire notes her disgust.
Do you have any idea how completely
gross that is?
Well, the first few times…
First few times? You mean he did it
more than once?
Are you crazy?
Obviously she’s crazy if she’s
screwing her shrink…
Have you ever done it?
I don’t even have a psychiatrist…
Have you ever done it with a normal
Now, didn’t we already cover this?
You never answered the question…
Look, I’m not gonna discuss my
private life with total strangers.
It’s kind of a double-edged sword,
Well, if you say you haven’t…
you’re a prude. If you say you
have…you’re a slut! It’s a trap.
You want to but you can’t but when
you do you wish you didn’t, right?
Or, are you a tease?
She’s a tease…
Oh why don’t you just forget it…
You’re a tease and you know it, all
girls are teases!
She’s only a tease if what she does
gets you hot…
I don’t do anything!
That’s why you’re a tease…
Okay, lemme ask you a few questions.
Allison is suddenly defensive.
I’ve already told you everything!
No! Doesn’t it bother you to sleep
around without being in love. I
mean don’t you want any respect?
I don’t screw to get respect…That’s
the difference between you and me…
Not the only difference, I hope.
Face it, you’re a tease.
I’m not a tease!
Sure you are! You said it yourself
sex is a weapon, you use it to get
No, I never said that, she twisted
my words around.
Oh then what do you use it for?
I don’t use it period!
Claire is on the verge of tears.
Oh, are you medically frigid or is
I didn’t mean it that way! You guys
are putting words into my mouth!
Well if you’d just answer the
Why don’t you just answer the
No big deal…
Yeah, answer it!
Answer the question, Claire!
Talk to us!
ANDREW & BRIAN
Come on, answer the question!
It’s easy, it’s only one question!
Claire silences all of them by screaming.
No! I never did it!
Silence for two beats.
I never did it either, I’m not a
nymphomaniac…I’m a compulsive
You are such a bitch! You did that
on purpose just to fuck me over!
I would do it though…If you love
someone it’s okay…
I can’t believe you, you’re so
weird. You don’t say anything all
day and then when you open your
mouth…you unload all these
tremendous lies all over me!
You’re just pissed off because she
got you to admit something you didn’t
want to admit to…
Okay, fine, but that doesn’t make it
any less bizarre…
What’s bizarre? I mean we’re all
pretty bizarre! Some of us are just
better at hiding it, that’s all.
How are you bizarre?
Allison decides to field that question.
He can’t think for himself…
She’s right…do you guys know what,
uh, what I did to get in here? I
taped Larry Lester’s buns together.
That was you?
Yeah, you know him?
Yeah, I know him…
Well then you know how hairy he is,
right? Well, when they pulled the
tape off, most of his hair came off
and some, some skin too…
Oh my God…
And the bizarre thing is, is that
I did it for my old man…I
tortured this poor kid, because I
wanted him to think that I was cool.
He’s always going off about, you
know, when he was in school…all
the wild things he used to do. And
I got the feeling that he was
disappointed that I never cut loose
on anyone, right…So, I’m…I’m
sitting in the locker room, and I’m
taping up my knee. And Larry’s
undressing a couple lockers down
from me. Yeah…he’s kinda…
he’s kinda skinny, weak. And I
started thinking about my father,
and his attitude about weakness.
And the next thing I knew, I uh, I
jumped on top of him and started
wailing on him…And my friends,
they just laughed and cheered me on.
And afterwards, when I was sittin’
in Vernon’s office, all I could
think about was Larry’s father. And
Larry havin’ to go home and…and
explain what happened to him. And
humiliation he mustuv felt. It
mustuv been unreal…I mean,
I mean, how do you apologize for
something like that? There’s no
way…it’s all because of me and
my old man. Oh God, I fucking hate
him! He’s like this…he’s like
this mindless machine that I can’t
even relate to anymore…”Andrew,
you’ve got to be number one! I
won’t tolerate any losers in this
family…Your intensity is for shit!
Win. Win! WIN!!!” You son of a
bitch! You know, sometimes, I wish
my knee would give…and I wouldn’t
be able to wrestle anymore. And he
could forget all about me…
I think your old man and my old man
should get together and go bowling.
Andrew laughs briefly.
It’s like me, you know, with my
grades…like, when I, when I
step outside myself kinda, and
when I, when I look in at myself
you know? And I see me and I don’t
like what I see, I really don’t.
What’s wrong with you? Why don’t
you like yourself?
‘Cause I’m stupid…’cause I’m failing
shop. See we had this assignment,
to make this ceramic elephant, and
um…and we had eight weeks to do
it and we’re s’posed ta, and it was
like a lamp, and when you pull the
trunk the light was s’posed to go
on…my light didn’t go on, I got a
F on it. Never got a F in my life…
When I signed up, you know, for the
course I mean. I thought I was
playing it real smart, you know.
‘Cause I thought, I’ll take shop,
it’ll be such an easy way to
maintain my grade point average…
Why’d you think it’d be easy?
Have you seen some of the dopes that
I take shop…you must be a fuckin’
I’m a fuckin’ idiot because I can’t
make a lamp?
No, you’re a genius because you
can’t make a lamp…
What do you know about Trigonometry?
I could care less about
Bender, did you know without
Trigonometry there’d be no
Without lamps, there’d be no light!
Okay so neither one of you is any
better than the other one…
Allison feels left out.
I can write with my toes! I can
also eat, brush my teeth…
With your feet?
…play Heart & Soul on the piano.
I can make spaghetti!
What can you do?
I can…uh…tape all your buns
I wanna see what Claire can do!
I can’t do anything.
Now, everybody can do something…
There’s one thing I can do, no
forget it, it’s way too embarrassing.
You ever seen Wild Kingdom? I mean
that guy’s been doing that show for
Okay, but you have to swear to God
you won’t laugh…I can’t believe
I’m actually doing this…
Claire takes lipstick out and opens it. She places it
between her breasts and applies it from her cleavage.
When she lifts her head, her lipstick is perfect.
Everyone claps. Bender’s clap is sarcastic and slow.
All right, great! Where’d you learn
to do that?
Camp, seventh grade…
That was great, Claire…my image of
you is totally blown…
You’re a shit! Don’t do that to her
you swore to God you wouldn’t laugh!
Am I laughing?
You fucking prick!
Bender turns to Andrew. As he speaks, we can see his
words hitting home.
What do you care what I think,
anyway? I don’t even count, right?
I could disappear forever and it
wouldn’t make any difference…I may
as well not even exist at this
(he turns to Claire)
And you…don’t like me anyway!
You know, I have just as many
feelings as you do and it hurts
just as much when somebody steps
all over them!
God, you’re so pathetic!
Don’t you ever…ever! Compare
yourself to me! Okay? You got
everything, and I got shit! Fuckin’
Rapunzel, right? School would
probably fucking shut down if you
didn’t show up! “Queenie isn’t
here!” I like those earrings Claire.
Are those real diamonds, Claire?
I bet they are…did you
work, for the money Shut…
for those earrings? Your mouth!
Or did your daddy buy those?
Claire starts crying.
I bet he bought those for you! I
bet those are a Christmas gift!
Right? You know what I got for
Christmas this year? It was a
banner fuckin’ year at the old
Bender family! I got a carton of
cigarettes. The old man grabbed me
and said “Hey! Smoke up Johnny!”
Okay, so go home’n cry to your
daddy, don’t cry here, okay?
There are a few beats.
My God, are we gonna be like our
It’s unavoidable, it just happens.
When you grow up, your heart dies.
Allison is on the verge of tears herself.
Um, I was just thinking, I mean. I
know it’s kind of a weird time, but
I was just wondering, um, what is
gonna happen to us on Monday? When
we’re all together again? I mean I
consider you guys my friends, I’m
not wrong, am I?
So, so on Monday…what happens?
Are we still friends, you mean?
If we’re friends now, that is?
Do you want the truth?
Yeah, I want the truth…
I don’t think so…
Well, do you mean all of us or just
With all of you…
That’s a real nice attitude, Claire!
Oh, be honest, Andy…if Brian came
walking up to you in the hall on
Monday, what would you do? I mean
picture this, you’re there with all
the sports. I know exactly what
you’d do, you’d say hi to him and
when he left you’d cut him all up
so your friends wouldn’t think you
really liked him!
‘Kay, what if I came up to you?
Same exact thing!
(furious and screaming at Claire)
You are a bitch!
Why? ‘Cause I’m telling the truth,
that makes me a bitch?
No! ‘Cause you know how shitty that
is to do to someone! And you don’t
got the balls to stand up to your
friends and tell ‘em that you’re
gonna like who you wanna like!
Okay, what about you, you hypocrite!
Why don’t you take Allison to one of
your heavy metal vomit parties? Or
take Brian out to the parking lot at
lunch to get high? What about Andy
for that matter, what about me?
What would your friends say if we
were walking down the hall together.
They’d laugh their asses off and
you’d probably tell them you were
doing it with me so they’d forgive
you for being seen with me.
(furious once again)
Don’t you ever talk about my
friends! You don’t know any of my
friends, you don’t look at any of my
friends and you certainly wouldn’t
condescend to speak to any of my
friends so you just stick to the
things you know, shopping, nail
polish, your father’s BMW and your
poor–rich–drunk mother in the
(furious and sobbing)
And as far as being concerned about
what’s gonna happen when you and I
walk down the hallways at school,
you can forget it! ‘Cause it’s never
gonna happen! Just bury your head
in the sand…and wait for your
I hate you!
There is silence until Brian speaks.
Then I assume Allison and I are
better people than you guys, huh?
Do you, would you do that to me?
I don’t have any friends…
Well if you did?
No…I don’t think the kind of
friends I’d have would mind…
I just wanna tell, each of you,
that I wouldn’t do that…I wouldn’t
and I will not! ‘Cause I think that’s
Your friends wouldn’t mind because
they look up to us…
Brian laughs at her.
You’re so conceited, Claire. You’re
so conceited. You’re so, like, full
of yourself, why are you like that?
I’m not saying that to be conceited!
I hate it! I hate having to go
along with everything my friends say!
Well then why do you do it?
I don’t know, I don’t…you don’t
understand..you don’t. You’re not
friends with the same kind of people
that Andy and I are friends with!
You know, you just don’t understand
the pressure that they can put on
Brian is shocked.
I don’t understand what? You think
I don’t understand pressure, Claire?
Well fuck you! Fuck you!
Brian hides his head in his arm because he is crying.
Know why I’m here today? Do you?
I’m here because Mr. Ryan found a
gun in the locker…
Why’d you have a gun in your locker?
I tried. You pull the fuckin’ trunk
on it and the light’s s’posed to go
on…and it didn’t go on, I mean,
What’s the gun for Brian?
Just forget it…
You brought it up, man!
I can’t have an F, I can’t have it
and I know my parents can’t have it!
Even if I aced the rest of the
semester, I’m still only a B. And
everything’s ruined for me!
Brian bashes a chair over.
So I considered my options, you
No! Killing yourself is not an
Well I didn’t do it, did I? No, I
don’t think so!
It was a hand gun?
No, it was a flare gun, went off
in my locker.
Andrew starts to laugh.
It’s not funny…
They all start to laugh, including Brian.
Yes it is…fuckin’ elephant was
You wanna know what I did to get in
here? Nothing…I didn’t have
anything better to do.
You’re laughing at me…
Allison starts to laugh too.
Yeah you are!
31. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
We see Brian putting a record on and then music starts.
We see them all dancing. This goes on for the duration
of the song.
32. INT. HEATING DUCT – DAY
We see Bender crawling back through the heating duct.
33. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Andrew, Allison, Claire and Brian are sitting, in that
order on the railing.
Are you gonna write your paper?
Well, it’s kinda a waste for all of
us to write our paper, don’t you
Oh, but that’s what Vernon wants us
True, but I think we’d all kinda
say the same thing.
You just don’t want to write your
True, but, you’re the smartest,
We trust you…
Brian glances over at Allison and Andrew who nod in
All right, I’ll do it…
Claire looks at Allison who looks back.
Where’re we going?
We see Claire putting eye make-up on Allison.
Don’t be afraid.
Don’t stick that in my eye!
I’m not sticking it, just close…
just go like that…
Claire closes her eyes. Allison mimics her.
Claire puts the make-up on her and Allison squeals.
You know you really do look a lot
better without all that black shit
on your eyes…
Hey…I like that black shit…
This looks a lot better…look up.
We see Brian thinking about what he’s going to write.
We see Andrew just thinking.
We see Allison and Claire again. Claire is still
putting make-up on Allison.
Please, why’re you being so nice to
‘Cause you’re letting me.
We see Brian begin to write.
We see Andrew, still deep in thought.
34. INT. CLOSET – DAY
We see Bender, in the closet once again. Claire opens
the door and enters.
Claire stares at him.
35. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
Brian is busily preparing the essay.
Andrew looks up and sees the newly made over Allison
is in awe.
Allison walks towards him and stops when she notices
Brian staring at her with his mouth open.
She glares at him.
36. INT. CLOSET – DAY
Claire kisses Bender, then she breaks the kiss.
Why’d you do that?
‘Cause I knew you wouldn’t.
You know how you said before, how
your parents used you to get back
at each other…wouldn’t I be
outstanding in that capacity?
Were you really disgusted about
what I did with my lipstick?
Bender nods and speaks at the same time.
37. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
We see Brian lift up his paper and kiss it.
We see Andrew and Allison.
What happened to you?
Why? Claire did it! What’s wrong?
Nothing’s wrong, it’s just so
different. I can see your face.
Is that good or bad?
We see Brian laugh and give himself a congratulatory
punch in the arm.
38. INT. HALLWAY – DAY
The five are walking down the hall where they are met
by Carl, sweeping up. Brian nods at him.
See ya Brian…
See you next Saturday…
39. EXT. PARKING LOT – DAY
Brian gets into his dad﨎 car and leaves.
Andrew and Allison kiss, Allison rips a patch off
Andrew﨎 jacket and gets into the car.
Andrew’s dad arrives and looks at him, then at Allison.
Andrew gets into the car and they drive off.
We see Claire take out one of her diamond earrings
and put it into Benders hand. They kiss and she gets
into her car. She leaves.
We see Bender put the earring in his ear.
40. INT. LIBRARY – DAY
We see Vernon pick up Brian’s essay and begin to read.
Dear Mr. Vernon, we accept the fact
that we had to sacrifice a whole
Saturday in detention for whatever
it was we did wrong. But we think
you’re crazy to make an essay
telling you who we think we are.
You see us as you want to see us…
In the simplest terms, in the most
41. EXT. FOOTBALL FIELD – DAY
We see Bender walking towards us as Brian’s monologue
But what we found out is that each
one of us is a brain…
…and an athlete…
…and a basket case…
…and a criminal…
Does that answer your question?
Sincerely yours, the Breakfast Club.
We see Bender walking across the football field
as he thrusts his fist into the air in a silent cheer
and freezes there.
The Breakfast Club
Andrew Clark………….Emilio Estevez
Richard Vernon………..Paul Gleason
Brian Johnson…………Anthony Michael Hall
John Bender…………..Judd Nelson
Claire Standish……….Molly Ringwald
Allison Reynolds………Ally Sheedy